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Stacey Kasdorf

Waiting

Have you guys ever had to wait a REALLY LONG time for something? Maybe a husband, a child, a job, an answer or maybe you're waiting but not even sure for what. I FEEL you. This has been us for the past 8 months. I honestly think this is the longest season of waiting that we have ever been in, and my patience is wearing thin. The hardest part of waiting this time is feeling like I've heard from God and know we're on the right path, but still no doors are opening. We're at a stalemate. If you don't know, my husband has played professional hockey for the past 2 years. His contract was up at the beginning of April, and he started looking at teams in Europe. A team in Germany was interested and flew him out in August for a month for a tryout. I really felt like God was saying we would be ending up in Germany this season, and felt such a peace about it. The team liked him but said the only way he could play was if he got his German passport because all of the international spots were already spoken for on the team. Once he got home he somehow gathered up enough paperwork (we think) from his Oma and Opa for them to apply for his German passport. 

The team said it would take 2-3 months, but I was like, it'll be less. I started cleaning up our stuff, cleared out our storage unit, getting the girls stuff ready, etc. Well here we are 3 months later and still nothing. The team is still interested and following up with the Embassy regularly to get the passport, but they are still waiting on some information. Do I still think we're going to go to Germany (even though the season is more than half over)? Deep down, yes. On the surface though, my hope is wearing thin, I'm losing confidence in the word I got from God in summer and some days I just want to throw in the towel. We have been staying at my parents house and have overstayed our welcome by 4 months, as we thought we would be gone at the beginning of the hockey season. It's so hard not feeling settled, not having a place to call home, feeling like we're in limbo and watching Jason work plus still go to the gym and get on the ice to stay on top of his game. 

Do you know how I'm getting through this though? Going back to the last word I got from God, which is that we would be in Germany. Did I hear Him right? Only time will tell, but holding on to that hope is what is getting me through these months. I think the "easier" thing to do at this point would be for Jason to hang up his skates, get a 9-5 job, buy a house and settle down. I just don't feel right about that right now though, and it's in these times that we truly have to rely on God, which I love. It's scary, the unknown, but having a faith makes these times of waiting worth it. I seriously can't wait for the day when I get to look back on this time and have it all make sense. I know that day will come, and I just have to focus on that day to get through these months of waiting.

Thankfully the girls are young and not in school so they're flexible which is perfect for this lifestyle. I'm also so lucky to be married to a guy that trusts God has a plan for our lives, doesn't give up on his dream even when a million obstacles are thrown in his way, and keeps our lives exciting. We have been able to spend more time with family and friends, and we are going to be home for Christmas which hasn't happened in like 5 years! There are so many things to be grateful for and I am choosing to focus on those things as we wait. 

Is there something you've been waiting for? Let me know below! I would love to connect with people in the same boat, or who have been in the same boat and have come out on the other side. Share your story below to offer support or hope for those reading. Stay tuned to see where we end up this year and what God has in store. He never ceases to amaze us.

Best,

Stacey

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